The ABILITY to read is useless if you DON’T do it!

I’ve covered this topic before, but based on my experience over the years—and the problem is definitely growing—I’m doing so once again.

For the record, I fully support the concept of justifiable homicide. All of us have an absolute right to kill in self-defense. We also have the right to do so defending our families, as well as any other innocents in mortal danger.

Of course, the threat must be REAL and PRESENT. And our actions must be REACTIVE based on moral and legal justification, not a proactively-based preemptive strike to avoid some possible future danger.

The bottom line? The police can’t be everywhere! So, we have to have some legal way to protect ourselves against imminent threats to our persons.

BUT what about our rights to protect ourselves from people who do things to us that, while certainly not imminent threats to our persons, may turn out to have been so in the long run? Let me explain.

I’ll use driving and taking forever to fill one’s gas tank as examples. And again for the record, I want you to know that I realize society must have rules that prohibit drivers from killing other drivers just because they appear to be, well… intellectually anemic.

Even though some drivers—whose lines of sight are dead level with the tops of their steering wheels—may be driving in the LEFT lane, at clearly glacial speeds, we can’t just run them off the road and shoot them.

This would violate various states’ aggressive driving laws. The police not only hate when this happens, they get downright SNOTTY about it. I think they call if “ROADRAGE!

But what about the times when other drivers—but never US—zoom straight past mere intellectual anemia and zip right over the boundary line to abject stupidity?

You know… things like driving for miles with a turn signal on. Or, tying up the gas pumps while swiping credit or debit cards BACKWARDS or UPSIDE DOWN.

And doing it MULTIPLE times no less while refusing to let others point out the problem as they stomp off in a huff to talk to the cashier inside the store rather than hit the intercom button right there in front of the gas pump.

Then, there is my ALL TIME FAVORITE: drivers that will NOT make a right turn on a red light, even though no traffic signs forbid it AND they’d need binoculars to see the nearest approaching car!

Why won’t they make the turn? The reasons are many, but the primary one is STUPIDITY. And, if YOU are one of these drivers, YOU! ARE! STUPID!

It’s a fact; we are a country with right-hand traffic. This means that we drive on the RIGHT. We also permit drivers to make right turns on red lights provided there are no location-specific signs forbidding it.

Confusion arises, however, because we also permit people who CAN’T read to qualify for a driver’s license.

Mind you, I’m not blaming ALL drivers who can’t read. They’re not the one’s causing most of the hold-ups. The drivers who can read but DON’T are the ones causing the problems.

Our state lawmakers changed motor vehicle codes to permit right-hand turns on red lights decades ago in order to keep traffic moving wherever it’s appropriate and safe to do so.

Motor vehicle manuals explain all of this clearly, but written manuals are useless to people who can’t read or to people who CAN read but simply DON’T read.

So to accommodate such people, our traffic signs combine WORDING and SYMBOLS.

In Delaware, for example, when drivers come to traffic LIGHTS and there are no traffic SIGNS to the contrary, they may turn RIGHT on the RED as long as they come to a complete stop and proceed with due precaution.

BUT if there is a sign that states “No turn on” with a right-pointing RED arrow symbol just below it, AND the traffic light is beaming a RED arrow, drivers are NOT permitted to turn, even if THEY think it’s safe to do so.

If the sign reads “No turn on” AND there is a solid RED circle beneath the wording, drivers are NOT permitted to turn until the traffic light turns GREEN!

As I wrote above, drivers who can’t read but understand the symbols are not causing the problems. The true culprits are the dummies who CAN read but DON’T and have no clue what the symbols mean.

Granted, none of these things poses direct, imminent threats to our lives. But they do pose possible, indirect long run threats; at least I think they do to mine. I’ve also checked around and others feel the same way. Let me explain.

These things cause our blood pressure to rise to dangerous levels. We can actually feel the veins in our temples bulging to twice—sometime to THREE times—their normal diameter.

It all boils down to the potential for a stroke or heart attack over prolonged exposure to such crap. In other words, these dumb asses DO pose a threat! Maybe not today or tomorrow, but certainly SOME day.

And when it happens, we’re going to slump over our steering wheels DEAD, most likely killing INNOCENT people, ALL because of some selfish, brain-dead morons who won’t read their driving manuals!

So, I propose a change in the criminal codes to include a defense similar to “Justifiable Homicide.” We could call it “Justifiable Road Rage.” Such a defense would permit us to pull these people over and choke them to death.

Or, in the case of those dummies who keep swiping their credit cards upside down or backwards, the new defense would permit us to take appropriate instructional action.

Of course, we WOULD have to show in court that such people are stupid well beyond the realm of remedial help.

In my case, I have a 2-watt blue laser that I built myself. I’ve used it for years for physics demonstrations. It certainly isn’t powerful enough to VAPORIZE anything or anyone, but it’ll get people’s attention in a hurry!

For the right price, I could easily retrofit a duplicate to the hood of any automobile or truck!

Oh, before I forget; if I’m stopped at a traffic light and the road arrows in the left lane indicate LEFT turn ONLY and the road arrows in the right lane—the one I’m in—indicate either STRAIGHT ahead traffic or RIGHT turn, make sure my RIGHT turn signal is flashing BEFORE you blow your damn horn.

Lasers can EASILY be mounted on the backs of vehicles as well as their fronts. So PAY ATTENTION!

ZZZZAAAAPPPP! I’m just sayin’…

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